Since Girl and Little Boy came to live with us, there's been lots of "finding the right words." How do you explain to Girl why she's moved to your home, her 5th house in 10 months, without making everyone else the villain? She herself gave us the words to explain one of her birthparents' problem: "they drink too many adult drinks." So imagine explaining to Girl why her mommy is in a rehab center - because she needs help not drinking the adult drinks. Or why her daddy's visits were ended - he is drinking adult drinks before he sees them & it's against the rules.
And it got worse. How do you tell Girl that it was decided she would be safest away from her mommy? That her hope of living with her again will never happen? There are no suggestions on the Internet, folks, because I Googled it in multiple ways. And even though in the situation, one can totally grasp why it's happening - you can't convince a young girl that it's the best thing for her.
Now, just a month after that gut-wrenching conversation, we have begun to tell her that she & her brother are going to be with us forever. We will never disappear, leave her with anyone else, or put her in an unsafe situation. And she doesn't believe us. We can only keep saying it, keep proving it, and hope someday she knows it.
And it got worse. How do you tell Girl that it was decided she would be safest away from her mommy? That her hope of living with her again will never happen? There are no suggestions on the Internet, folks, because I Googled it in multiple ways. And even though in the situation, one can totally grasp why it's happening - you can't convince a young girl that it's the best thing for her.
Now, just a month after that gut-wrenching conversation, we have begun to tell her that she & her brother are going to be with us forever. We will never disappear, leave her with anyone else, or put her in an unsafe situation. And she doesn't believe us. We can only keep saying it, keep proving it, and hope someday she knows it.
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