Now A Family of *gulp* Six.

Kindergarten is hard. That's Charlie's summary of his school year so far. He has a teacher who has high expectations! It was a good/bad start - he likes school, but some things are too easy and boring (alphabet, he already knows it). On the other hand, some things have been challenging to him - cutting, sitting quietly. We have gotten 2 calls from his teacher so far about his behavior. We all agree his behavior is worse in the afternoon and it's because he is so darn tired! That doesn't excuse his hitting, of course, or refusing to follow directions - but it does explain it. He's on a special behavior plan now, where his teacher notifies us what "color" he is (green, yellow, blue, red). If he gets 2 green in a row, we will give him a reward. Since starting it 4 weeks ago, he has earned 3 rewards. It clearly helps. He likes gym the best, and loves before & after-school care. Playtime! He is definitely ready to read - he's always spelling out words ...

Charlie had his first true playdate today. He met a friend from daycare at McDonald's, where the mom and I chatted and the boys ran around crazy in the play area, taking occasional breaks for their vanilla shakes. They played for an hour and a half. I say this in amazement and with a little bit of awe. Yet another example of what we didn't know with Roman, & how easy "normal" kids are. I was waiting for the moment - when Charlie would bust in rudely, say he was tired, bored, or didn't want to play with his friend anymore. It didn't happen. I was waiting for the faux injury to occur, so Charlie could cry and beg to go home. It didn't happen.  We went, we played, we went home with a minimal amount of whining for a McDonald's toy.  I don't think I can describe to you gentle readers what it's like with Roman, except to say, constantly exasperating.  Roman has never played for 1.5 hours without needing me to intervene. He is always bored withi...

With all of Roman's issues we've dealt with, we were sure that he would be the most affected by Doug's hospitalization. Maybe because of how he and we have learned to process things, however, Roman did well! It was Charlie, who we first thought was taking things in and we were doing a good job with, who has suffered the most. When Doug returned from the hospital Charlie was very excited, but within hours was gravitating toward me for everything. He got clingy, emotional, whiney & weepy. He would not go to Doug for anything, and sometimes would even deliberately skip over his Dad to ask me for things. The other night it all came to a head, when it was Doug's turn to put Charlie to bed. Char wanted nothing to do with him and started crying and having a tantrum over wanting me. As I finally calmed him down and agreed to put him to bed, out popped the fear that Charlie had been dealing with in his little 4 yro mind - "When is Daddy going to die?" With some ...

My little independent son. Loves to be a helper - he wants to cook, do the dishes, and tonight he wanted to help me take the trash & recycling out. He's very proud of himself when he does, too. He loves cars, planes, "guys," & recently decided he needs to collect Pokemon cards like Roman. He also has shown some interest in creating Lego guys. At school his behavior is much improved. No more hitting. Between them and us, we've almost cured him of constant potty-talk, too. Now we're just in the "not following any directions" stage, which drives Doug crazy.  Charlie decided his second swim coach was not as good as his first, Mr. Joe. He told me he wouldn't do a rollover for anyone but Mr. Joe... so we switched his swim class to a new day & time to accommodate his affection. And what do you know, after 2 practices he's doing rollovers for Mr. Joe. Charlie is also excelling at Tiny Tigers tang soo do, earning his "tiger stripe...

I certainly can't call Charlie "Mr. Squishypants" anymore. Little guy turned four today! At times I can't believe how fast it's gone... and there are times when I feel like he's always been a part of our life. He's such a joy-bringer to our family. Watching him figure out the world is so much fun. From being a shocker pregnancy, to a shocker birth, this boy has grown to be quite a light for us. Happy birthday, Charlie-boy!

Oh, Charlie. He was so excited to sing for the mayor at his holiday party today. But could I get him to wear something festive? Oh, no. Could I even convince him to wear a more traditional color like red or green? Heck, no. So there he is, front & center, wearing a bright orange shirt & camouflage pants. Not worth the argument, although on the inside I want to make sure everyone knows - he chose his own clothes today! It was so darling to see them sing. They performed four songs - Jingle Bells, Up On the Housetop, I Made A Snowball, and We Wish You a Merry Christmas. The other 3 songs are together on a separate video and too long to post here. But I hope this gets you in a festive mood!

Charlie is in underwear all day now! He has only had one partial accident in 5 days. Awesome.  Roman's neurofeedback is finally showing some success too - we have had 14 sessions now. In tracking some of his behaviors, we have noticed 4 of them, most significantly his anxiety/fear of being alone, have really decreased. We also no longer see the constant interruptions & overtalking; his "boredom" and arguing has gone down as well.  Ro still has trouble regulating himself and keeping on an even keel, and we have noticed his impulsive behavior has ramped up. But, it's all the 3rd month of summer, and who knows what will happen when school starts? We have been pleased with what's happened so far. I have been on Weight Watchers for a month now and have lost a grand total of 13.5 lbs. What's even better though, is the every day things that have changed. I was able to pull 3 shirts out of storage that now fit me again. My belt has gone in one hole. A couple p...

The dreaded training... potty, that is. Just like when he was a newborn, I am now talking about Charlie's pee and poop all the time. Whatever nice words my parents taught me for these bodily functions have gone out the window. Whatever works, baby. Yesterday was our first true day of training. Decided to go without diaper outside and C. notified me immediately when he had to go. Success! Decided to go inside without a diaper, and he went another 4 times throughout the day. No accidents. Great success! Today we started out well again, with C. requesting "to go nakey like before." Continued to do his #1 when at home in the toilet, with warning. This afternoon we were playing (him nakey) when C. said, "Poop!" I said with some urgency, "go to the bathroom! Go! Go!" He stood up... and it was already done. On the carpet. Easy to clean, luckily. After dinner he said his tummy hurt, but he gave us warning, and did his first #2 in the toilet! Woohoo! But I shou...

I know I should do a better job of recording Charlie's little sweet nothings, so that's today's post. Except I really have to bullet-point it. One Liners: Charlie, after this song it's naptime. Charlie, do you know what time it is? "Um... hide & seek?" You can have one cookie. "One at a time?" Funny words or phrases: "Mugot" instead of forgot "Actually, no." But really, the funniest thing he does at the age of 3 is try to control his little world. He likes to tell Doug and I how to sit or lay down with him. He orders us what songs to sing at bedtime. He is also fighting for independence - we regularly hear "I'll do it myself!" He is putting his pants on but still gets tangled in his shirts. And when it comes to toys, it's anything with wheels or wings - planes, trains, & automobiles. He is really sweet too, and shows affection we never got from Roman. I finally had to ask another mom if it was normal for ...

I love that Army phrase. "Situation normal: all *$&@ up." That's pretty much life here at the VE household. While on a day to day basis everything is just fine, our kind of "fine" is much different than most people's. We've been tracking Roman's probable bipolar on a calendar and have found a definite peak & valley cycle. Now that we expect things on certain days, I think overall his larger rages are happening less and less frequently. So our weeks generally look like this: Sunday: Emotional meltdown or rage. The buildup of fun/less structure. He will end up needing to be helped to calm down. Monday: Very emotional, typically anger; occasionally needs help; still coming down from weekend. Tuesday: Good day. Wednesday: Emotional, cries easily. This is his "low" day. Thursday: Good day. Friday: Good day. Beginning to ramp up for "high" weekend. Saturday: Will have a short and quick "high" in the a.m. which we can...

A remote control Lightning McQueen! He can run it himself. Obviously, he's very pleased. Charlie got (Roman's) toy of the Leapfrog alphabet singing thingy. He clearly likes it. And this last one? Just an adorable shot of him sleeping in our bed while Doug was out of town. So. darn. sweet.

Charlie has begun to express his creative side. On the floor, with a Sharpie. On the wall, with a pink crayon. Thank goodness for Mr. Clean Magic Eraser!

I told someone the other day that Charlie was "my normal." He's really just a pleasure to spend time with. He's almost 3, and has the attitude that comes with that. Wants to do almost everything himself. He is happy most the time, which is how he's been since birth. Even the caregivers at daycare have mentioned this - he is just happy! His speech is getting better too. What we have noticed is that the beginning sounds of words don't usually get pronounced, and "s" definitely doesn't. Like "poon" instead of "spoon." Or "har" instead of "car." I do expect at some point he will need speech therapy, but I also hear him trying to say these sounds more and more. He loves to help around the house. His favorite is unloading the dishwasher, naming everything that he hands to me. When in a good mood, he'll even help pick up his toys but they don't always end up where we want them to. We are about done with h...

Charlie had some manly surgery done on Monday - outpatient, and he's feeling great - but I certainly fell behind on doing my pages. While waiting for the surgery I did have a chance to brainstorm a lot of ideas for my alpha book, so that has been helpful. Better yet - I is today, & I want to take a picture of my favorite ice cream. It calls for a trip to Baskin Robbins after dinner tonight!

Roman has 2 days in his new classroom under his belt, and things are fine academically speaking. I had a chance to speak with his teacher yesterday after school & unlike most parents (so I've heard) I decided to take the high road and just commiserate as a fellow teacher how stressed she must be to have to set up a classroom in less than 24 hours. It's certainly not her fault the district is lame in adding a class at the last minute. Socially speaking, I think Roman is going to have a harder time this year. He has no close friend in his class although he did know 3-4 kids. Roman is the kind who wants everyone to like him and there's a "mean" kid in his class who has been rude already, making fun of his shoes (which are totally cool, btw) on the playground. Roman takes everything personally so of course, this led to a meltdown this evening because he wanted new shoes immediately. It took awhile to get at the heart of the matter, and when he finally said what ha...

Continuing to encourage Charlie in his pedaling pursuits, Roman first modeled correct biking procedure while Charlie watched all summer. At this point, Roman was giving Charlie pushes from behind & chanting songs to encourage him. And then, all of the sudden.... Charlie pedaled! Currently he pedals about three-fourths of the time, doing the "Flintstone" with his feet the rest. But he does love to be like big brother!

Charlie has been following Roman around all summer. He imitates Roman doing everything. His speech is coming along really fast now, with sentences being the norm now (although often leaving some words out). The connections he makes are pretty amazing. He is Opposite Boy when it comes to food & activities, liking everything Roman did not (& vice versa). One thing he did insist on, however, was a temporary tattoo. Roman has a sheet of them that he occasionally uses. He let Charlie have a tiger on his left forearm. When Charlie went to bed that night, he was crying & babbling. I went in and finally figured out – he wanted 2 more tattoos, one on his right hand and one on his right forearm. I had to promise he’d get one in the morning for him to finally calm down! He had his first playdate this past Wednesday with Allie, the little sister of Roman’s friend. He was SO excited to play in their playroom & on the playscape in their yard. He also likes when Roman’s friends come ...

Charlie, pointing at bird: "Chicken!" me: "That's a robin. That bird is a robin." Charlie: "Robin." me: "Yes, a robin." ...5 seconds later... me: "What kind of bird is that, Charlie?" Charlie: "Peacock!"

While Roman is just as adorable and wonderful as Charlie... he isn't thrilled to have his picture taken and he rarely will pause for a video anymore. So here's more of Charlie! On one of the days Charlie was "suspended" from daycare I started singing Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star and was surprised to hear Charlie trying to sing along. I ran for the camera and got him almost cooperating with me to sing it again. What does it matter? He's just darn cute to watch anyway.

Charlie loves anything big brother is doing. Recently they've played a combination of chase and Star Wars. Roman will shoot at Charlie with his clone blaster, Charlie will screech, laugh, & run for the mini hockey stick. He holds it well, too - sticks the bent part under his armpit, points it right at Roman, and makes noises like he's shooting. If you ask, he will inform you plainly it's his gun. The boys then go running around the house shooting & chasing each other (& then falling down "dead," like above) until they are both laughing hysterically - or someone trips & falls. Of course, at first Charlie's gun play bothered me a bit. It's funny to see a 2-year-old say "gun!" and make shooting noises, but then I think... oh gosh, he's 2. Should a 2 year old be able to do that? Imitation is the greatest form of flattery, though, and goodness knows based on what Roman did at the same age, Charlie will make a gun out of something ...